"He struggles with us, strengthens our nerves, and sharpens our skill. Our antagonist is our helper." - Edmund Burke
Dad is screaming again. He's drunk. He's always drunk. I don't know why I ever excepted him to be sober. I climb out of bed to head downstairs. I need to get a handle on the situation before he does something we will both regret.
It's been just me, and Dad for as long as I can remember. Mom left us, though I don't know when. He never talks about it, but I have heard enough of the rumors. I'm one of those kids that people feel sorry for, but no one ever does anything to help. The one they will smile at sweetly as they greet them, but is never invited over for dinner, or to play. Not that I would go. Dad says I'm only allowed out of the house for school. It's not that I am afraid of going out. But Dad can be strange at times. There is a light in his eyes that kind of flickers off when he gets mad, and it get's weird. I would just rather not see what happens afterwards.
As I head downstairs Dads screams get louder. He is in the living room, but he's not alone. There is another voice mixed in with his screams. Female. It sounds like she is trying to make herself invisible by keeping her voice as small as possible. I freeze at the halfway down the stairs. From here, I know that Dad can't see me, but I can see him, and the woman coward before him.
Dad is a huge man. Six foot six, two hundred and fifty pounds of muscle. He's intimidating. But standing over that woman, there was more to him. He had a strange power over her. She could have easily yelled for help. She was closer to the door than he was, so she could have ran. But she just sat there, motionless, eyes closed, practically whispering as she begged him to calm down.
I want to run. My feet carried me slowly down the steps.
"Dad," my voice is barely louder than the woman "What are you doing?"
I look over and realize that I have seen this woman before. When Dad takes the long way to drop me off at school. She always sits on her porch. It's the house that he slows down at. He always ask what I think of the house. He called it his.
Dad turns to look at me. His eyes are dead. The light is gone, and they are like two shiny black marbles staring back at me. His smile is slow, and eerily out of place. I only have a moment to realize that I should run before it happens. Dad grabs me by the neck, and throws me against the wall. The impact sends a flash of hot white light across my vision, and there is a buzzing in my ears that is dizzying.
"Do you ever wonder," he spits at me "what happened to your mother?"
My eyes go wide. He is pleased with my reaction.
"She tried to get away. She was mine, and she tried to get away."
I watch, unable to move as he reaches for the woman on the floor. She is crying, begging. Dad's smile gets wider. He puts one massive hand around her throat, and reaches for her pants with the other. She's screaming now, which makes my dad laugh a deep, evil laugh. I wish she would shut up. She is not helping. I get to my feet, and start walking over.
"Dad, stop," I say calmly. "You're hurting her. Let her go, Dad."
"I'm not hurting her. She is mine. This is what she needs."
The color on her face drains, and her eye bulge out. She's clawing at him now, screaming. He already has her pants on the ground, and her underwear follow. She is horrified. I turn away. I have never seen a woman undressed.
"Dad... stop!"
He throws her on the floor, and punches her so hard, you hear a cracking sound. She goes so still, I feel my stomach lurch.
"You want to know what happened to your mother" he ask as he pushes down his pants, and boxers.
"Watch, son. Watch me. This is how you claim a woman. Watch."
My head turns of it's own violation. The woman is still laying motionless on the floor. Dad smiles his evil smile at me, and I am filled with the urge to throw up. Then, staring at me in the eyes, he lowers himself on top of her, and as violently as possible thrust into her. Still, she doesn't move. He looks at her for a brief moment, laughs, and turns his attention back to me.
I can't move. I don't know how long I stood here, while my dad held my gaze. No idea how long it was before he got up, and pulled his pants up. All I know is I want to hurt him. I ball my hands into fist. My body trembles with anger.
How stupid was this woman? Why would she come here? How dare she fall asleep, and let him do that to her? Stupid! I want to hit her. I want to kill him.
"You plan on hitting me, son?"
"No. I plan on killing you."
He laughs at me. Actually laughs at me.
"You know the difference between you, and your mother?"
I only stare at him.
"Your mother was smart enough not to answer that question."
He walks towards me. I take a step back, but it's not enough. I see his fist come down, and then there is darkness.
..............
I'm on the floor. Face first. There is pain. Lots of it. My dad's boots come into my line of vision. I look up slowly. He smiles, leans down and whispers "You're mine now too."
